The Awful Truth

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Dear Ted:
One of my favorite shows on TV is Gossip Girl, but I got to know is there any dirt on the costars? Seems as if Blake Lively and Leighton Meester don't get along too well. Also does anyone else, besides Chace Crawford of course, have a Blind Vice? Thanks! Xoxo
—Melia

Dear GG Gossip:
When Team Awful has spotted the two girls out partying, the two girls haven't even acknowledged each other. Battle of the egos, I'm thinking. As for being BV subjects, Chacey-poo is the only one holding down the naughty GG fort.

Dear Ted:
This is completely random Ted, but did you know if you made Tom Cruise a blonde, he would look just like Peter Facinelli? It's creepy! On a completely different note, who's Terry Tush-Trade? For the love of all that's Holy and good Ted (I know you're a devout Presby)! I have to know. Your loving, devoted, and faithful followers want, no, need to know. Please man! It's almost Christmas ya know. Spill!
—Bubble 

Dear Twins:
Um, no way will Facinelli ever look like Cruise. You might be right, but I refuse to imagine it. As for TTT, my lips are sealed until Terry's are not. Or gets caught with one of those damn flipcams.

Dear Ted:
It is 4 a.m. here in Chicago and I am up sipping tea to sooth my never-ending sore throat. I just saw a snippet of Robin Robertson's interview with Janet Jackson. She was talking about MJ's death and her family's attempt at interventions. She also puts it out there who she blames for her brother's death. Although she looked beautifully made up and composed in the interview, her eyes looked so sad. Any thoughts? Is Janet really speaking from the heart? Much love from a true Ted fan.
—Irish_blue

Dear Questioning Heartache:
Janet speaks more from the heart where Joe speaks more from the pocket book. But there are still many things left unsaid in this family.

Dear Ted:
I just don't think Taylor-squared is real. I mean the obvious hints in interviews and how it's conveniently getting them more attention around the re-release of her album and the release of New Moon. It just seems too perfect, and if Taylor Swift's a good friend, she wouldn't date Selena Gomez's ex. It just doesn't make sense. Xx
—Robs 

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Dear Ted:
I find it kind of strange. This past August, you were talking about the Jonas Brothers and you mentioned that as far as their "goody-two-shoes" image was concerned, you had your eye on Joe and that Nick was a bad boy waiting to emerge, alluding to the fact that they weren't as innocent as they seemed. Now, this past October, you seem to have changed your tune, recently saying that the Jonas Brothers are "as goody-two-shoes as they seem, at least when it comes to those purity rings." So which is it really? Are they good boys with hidden bad-boy tendencies, or are they really as wholesome and innocent as they want us to believe?
—Jenny

Dear Ho-Bro:
Depends which brother you're asking about. One is about as far off from a goody-goody as you can imagine.

Dear Ted:
If I sent you a new vampire storyline, what would you do with it?
—Shaft

Dear Fangbanger:
Please elaborate, darling.

Dear Ted:
Not good to compare Chris Brown vs. Rihanna to Nicole Kidman. Chris Brown committed the act of violence himself, and Nicole Kidman did not. I agree that it would have been wise for her to address the issue, but the security guard acted of his own free will, and he did it either as an independent contractor for her or while under the employ of a security agency. It probably was a legal choice on her part, like it or not.
—CCCool

Dear So Diplomatic:
What, are you like a rational thinker or something?

Dear Ted:
So Ted, is your Twi source related to, employed by or do they work with someone related to, employed by Robsten? Can you give us this much?
—K

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Dear Ted:
Justin Long made a cameo when Drew Barrymore hosted, same for Scarlett Johansson when her hubby, Ryan Reynolds, was on the show...getting your significant other to guest spot is all the rage these days! Would be one helluva great way to tell the world they're more than amigos. So Gerard Butler was the guest host Saturday night, and James Franco made a cameo.
—JLM

Dear Saturday Night Gay:
Love where your dirty head's at. But like Jennifer Aniston would really stop by or something? Sorry—don't think either dude would be so obvious, were they truly launching on each other, which, of course, would be so hot.

Dear Ted:
I heart you and am a huge fan. I've been reading your column since back when you referred to Gwyneth as "Fishstick." But I'm bothered by your comments on Hollywood women like Gwynnie, Jen Garner, etc. If they demand proper treatment from their husbands, you call them bitchy and manipulative. If they try to work it out with scummy men (Sean Penn, Duchovny, etc.) they are spineless. You can't have it both ways, Ted. I know healthy relationships don't make for good gossip, but what would you have a woman do?
–Nancy

Dear Not Exactly:
Definitely don't think there are only two categories for women in Hollywood. But think of it this way—in order to make it to the top of the H'wood ladder, it doesn't just take talent, babe. There are loads of decent actresses in this town. It takes cunning and thick skin—something not all "nice" girls (and boys) don't always have

Dear Ted:
Nick Jonas has been spotted with Courtney Galiano at these places! All of these are true and pictures have been posted on Oceanup: Kings of Leon concert, leaving AMC movie together, jogging together in Breast Concert marathon, putting her in Bounce video, picking her up at her hotel Niagara on the Lake. He also took her to the first baseball games they attended in Toronto. Nick is sitting next to Courtney and they both look like they are drinking Diet Coke. Hello Pedo! It's so gross. What are his parents thinking? FYI as of 8/17 she had a steady BF she said in a chat! So, she leaves her BF of 3 yrs for a boy? She's a woman.
—Born to sell

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Is Brad Pitt giving up his film career for something smaller? What—or who—is keeping Gerard Butler up at night? And what the hell is really going on with Sophia Bush and Austin Nichols? Didn't they learn from David Letterman that you shouldn't date where ya work?

Find out in this week's Truth, Lies & Ted!

________

Awww, look at the cute family! The Jolie-Pitts!

Humberto Carreno/startraksphoto.com

Dear Ted:
There's a lot of speculation about whether Jennifer Aniston and Gerard Butler have taken their onscreen relationship offscreen. They seem at the very least to be great friends and admirers of each other. Is there anything more going on there? The dinner they shared last week had conflicting reports: one stating they were intimate and affectionate with each other, while others said they were just having a "friendly dinner." Is the former just overactive imaginations, or is the latter just PR control, trying to cover the true nature of their relationship? Gerard let it slip in a radio interview that he had recently been to a BBQ at Courteney Cox's—is this all the proof needed to know that he and Jen are indeed more than mere friends?
—Rarnold

Dear Loveline:
There will be no Geraniston anytime soon. No romantic gazing-into-each-other's-eyes kinda dinner will be had by these two. This is strictly Renée Zellweger-George Clooney redux.

Dear Ted:
I hope Rob Pattinson does SNL. He is awesome! Someone needs to tell his manager and publicist to do their jobs and get him up to host. Anyway, Megan Fox is doing SNL next Saturday...can't wait. If she can do it, R.Pattz can, too!
—Nikkz

Dear Anomaly:
A girl who loves R.Pattz and Megan? Thought it wasn't possible. Agree with you on all of the above, babe.

Dear Ted:
Kanye is such a douche nozzle! Do you think he needs to spend part of his break in rehab?
—Karen

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UPN/20th Century Fox; Summit Entertainment

Dear Ted:
I think Rob and Kristen should be Buffy and Angel for Halloween. Your thoughts?
—Jess

Dear Team Angel:
Love, love and more love! But let's not make Kristen have to kill Rob and bring him back from hell, etc.

Dear Ted:
I think I am becoming obsessed with "beards." Are they so shallow as to enter into a fake relationship just for the attention from the press for themselves…and to cover for someone who is in the closet? I mean, Ted, what's in it for them? And why do closeted celebrities feel they have to stay in the closet? Haven't we made any strides at all in this country? Am I naive?
—P.K.

Dear Forward Thinker:
Only naive to the Biz, hon-cake. You don't see Neil Patrick Harris or T.R. Knight (whom we both adore) getting offered parts in big flicks where guy gets girl, do ya? That's the fear of the closeted actor. As for the beard, a lot of them have secrets they need covered, too. Not to mention they're often vicarious to the max.

Dear Ted:
Why is there no Blind Vice archive? Wouldn't it be nice if it were organized by person, and not by date. P.S.: How about some new gay Blinds that aren't about Twilight? Dish!
—Blue Rafael

Dear Patience Is a Virtue:
We promise, we're on the B.V. archive task. Over a thousand of them, baby, remember. And it'll be a hell of a lot better than just being organized by person. As for gay blinds, you clearly must be new to this column. Dig farther back, babe!

Dear Ted:
Did Angelina fool around with Gerard Butler while filming Tomb Raider 2? She has fooled around with almost every leading man in her movies, but I never heard anything about the two of them.
—C.J.

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Dear Ted:
I just watched Jennifer Lopez's appearance on Rachael Ray, and she made several unflattering comments about her hubby. Not that I am surprised that all is not family bliss in the Lopez-Anthony household, but I was kinda surprised she made these comments on national TV. And she was plugging a vaccine for whooping cough. The whole thing was just really odd. What is your take on their marriage?
—Perplexed in the mountains

Dear J.Love:
Jennifer would never admit anything was wrong with her life, ever. I don't know if I see divorce in their future; I just see a mostly uncomfortable coupling, especially for Anthony. Jennifer would never let herself have another publicly failed marriage. Never. Not sure if it's the Catholic or the C-word in her.

Dear Ted:
Got a great story idea for you. Actually, I have two ideas. You had compared the Harry Potter and Twilight movies and actors with one another, but instead you should have compared the production studios with one another. One is a class act and will be around a long time. The other, let's just say, will be featured as an E! True Hollywood Story: The Rise and Fall of Summit Entertainment. Can't wait to watch it.
—lcjmommy

Dear No Wait:
You're watching it happening live right now!

Dear Ted:
You were right all along about the how shady Summit really is and the low levels it will stoop to! First with Robsten and now with Rachelle Lefevre. Do the suits there have any idea how horrible they look? They seriously messed up with Rachelle, and now they're tring to pin it back on her. I think they are absolute scum! Do you think they will ever let Robsten be or let us have Rachelle back?
—Shaun

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Dear Ted:
Why are you so mean to Nikki Reed? I know that people love Robsten but why throw Nikki under the bus? Nikki is not a fame whore. She's done nothing to deserve that title. Robsten idiots unfairly gave that to her. You know that fans didn't like her since she was announced as Rosalie. They didn't give her a chance. That's where the hate came from. So why stimulate undeserved hate with insinuating things without any facts? The fact that Nikki values Kristen's friendship over Rob says it all. You think if the N & R fling didn't happen Kristen would have dumped Michael? Why don't you apologize to Nikki? If Nikki kills herself over this, I blame you and won't stop until you're fired!
—My Ballet

Dear Ouch!:
Wow. All I can say is… Nikki, is that you? Of course, it's not. But, whoever it is, look, if anybody offs themselves (even emotionally) over a gossip blogger's comments, you're in the wrong business, clearly. 

Dear Ted:
I just wanted to thank you for reporting on the Stewart-Pattinson (may as well hyphenate the names á la marriage style) liaison. There is something so Romeo and Juliet about the two of them. Oh, and by the way, fair prince, you're looking pretty darned dashing yourself. You're way too gorgeous in that rose shirt you had on during a recent broadcast. Yummmy.
—Sno

Dear Dramatic:
Thanks, doll, I'm blushing to match my wardrobe! And let's pray Robsten turns out better than Romeo and Juliet did.

Dear Ted:
Shafterella Shoshstein's boyfriend is also famous, right? So why don't you give him a nickname and make his own Blind Vice?
—Jack

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Lisa O'Connor/ZUMApress.com, Jim Spellman/Getty Images

"Gerry has hair. That's the only difference."

—Curb Your Enthusiasm's Cheryl Hines, on the difference between working with Larry David and Ugly Truth hunky co-star Gerard Butler. Uh, does hair make the man? Not to us—we'd totally rather hang with the chuckle-worthy Larry than the bitchy Butler . Sorry.

Kevin Winter/ Getty Images

"She's not too afraid to go out and have a few glasses of wine, a cigarette, have a McDonalds. And I gotta tell you, that's my kind of woman."

—Gerard Butler, telling us exclusively about the appeal of his The Ugly Truth costar, Katherine Heigl—'cause we truly wanted to know. Hey, at least Kath's got one person out there she hasn't pissed off yet. Too bad he's not an Emmy voter!

Albert L. Ortega / Getty Images

Dear Ted:
Most of the Emmy predictions had David Duchovny as a shoo-in. Do you think he got snubbed because of what's happened to him personally this year? I guess all the "happy family" photo opportunities haven't been good enough to turn his reputation around.
—Debralynn 

Dear Emmy Hate:
Probably not, but I don't care either way. The Emmy noms are always unfair; there were far more interesting people and politics behind all of this year's snubs than David freakin' Duchovny. 

Dear Ted:
Do you think that after all the Twilight movies Robert Pattinson will be able to do anything else? Part of me says yes he will because he's such a talented actor, but the other part says that people will only see him as Edward Cullen. What do you think? I mean, how does he become this generation's Brad Pitt?
—All Smiles 

Dear Future Rob:
Yes, he will certainly be able to do other work. Even if he weren't talented, suits know how much publicity he'll give to a film. Think less Brad Pitt, more Johnny Depp, though. 

Dear Ted:
Bravo my friend, bravo. Well done, well said, good job and all that comes with. Your "Is Cheap Robert Pattinson" post was true genius. Too bad so many of your posters got stuck on the "tipping" part of it. They didn't see the real meat of the 3P theory, did they? Rob is a good guy all around. You don't have to know him personally to see that. It shows, very obviously, in the way he conducts himself. I am very glad that Kristen Stewart has him. They are both very, very fortunate to have a love that many search for and never find.
—Jennifer 

Dear Pattz Preacher:
Amen, darling. And maybe after this week's big Comic-Con meeting, Kristen's fan woes will finally vanish for good. 

Dear Ted:
My birthday is this week. For my present, can you please reveal a Blind Vice? I'm not picky, any one will do. Love you and your column!
—Valerie

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Anthony, PacificCoastNews.com

What's the right word for a supersexy male stud who loses his simmering appeal once he opens his mouth?

Take for ince the John Mayer or Gerard Butler types—and no, not just because they have Jennifer Aniston in common. Both of these guys are superyummy to look at but tend to totally lose their hotness with each media-whoring utterance that comes out of their mouths.

Ever heard the phrase stand still, look pretty? That's what these types of guys need to opt for more often. Think the penile version of Megan Fox—although we don't mind when that troublemaker opens her trap.

We think the perf word for this dude dynamic is douche-throb. Think you all can do better?