Movie Reviews
Hot-buttered opinion on the latest flicks
movies (718 posts)
Review: Old Dogs Shouldn't Have Been Let Out—Bad Dogs! Bad!
Review in a Hurry: Who let this Dogs out—and why wasn't it put down instead? With John Travolta and Robin Williams mugging as best buds who care for two 7-year-olds, this stinky mutt of a movie pees on your leg and tells you it's comedy.
Review: Ninja Assassin Somehow Fails to Be the Most Awesome Movie Ever
Review in a Hurry: Remember when "from the creators of The Matrix Trilogy" meant more karate chops for your buck? After Speed Racer and now the shoulda-been-a-videogame Ninja Assassin, we're not buying it anymore.
Review: The Road is Raw, Tough and All Kinds of Not-Fun
Review in a Hurry: Based on Cormac McCarthy's Pulitzer Prize-winning novel, The Road is a post-apocalyptic tale that's less Mad Max, more Wild West Cloverfield, and it impresses with a raw sense of urgency.
Review: The Princess and the Frog an Old-Fashioned Fairy Tale For Totes Modern Ladies!
Review in a Hurry: In an era dominated by CGI, Disney makes a bold return to 2-D animation. The medium may be old-fashioned, but the story is thoroughly, refreshingly modern. Funny, inspiring, and gorgeously rendered, The Princess and the Frog is an instant classic.
Review: Broken Embraces Kinda Like a Telenovela for Film Snobs
Review in a Hurry: Spanish filmmaker Pedro Almodóvar returns with more high drama, and more Penélope Cruz. Broken Embraces is full of sex, betrayal, money, and blackmail—sort of a telenovela for film snobs. The mix of surrealism and passion resonates, but the plodding pace threatens to suck the life out of this tall tale.
Review: Planet 51 Really Familiar—And Not in a Good Way
Review in a Hurry: Sure, every story has already been told, but there still could have been a smidgen of originality in this role-reversal alien-invasion pic. Staring bright animation and the voices of Justin Long and Dawyne Johnson, Planet 51 follows a hilarious concept with weak execution and way too many references to better films.
Review: Nic Cage at His Crazy Best in Bad Lieutenant
Review in a Hurry: You may have heard that Nicolas Cage acts completely insane in the title role of a New Orleans cop who becomes a heavy drug user. It's true...but "completely insane" is relative in the case of this particular actor, and this isn't as over-the-top as, say, The Wicker Man. But it is an engaging cop caper complete with Cage craziness, and that's enough.
Review: The Blind Side All Heartstrings and Sandra Bullock
Review in a Hurry: The Blind Side doesn't pretend to be anything but a heartstrings-tugging "feel good" movie. Swelling music, tearful epiphanies, all that sentimental crap is here in spades. But something funny happens at the end of the movie: You feel good.
Review: New Moon Is Either Just Fine or Way Mopey, Depending On Who You Are
Should you go see New Moon? Does it matter what we say? You're going to see New Moon. But if you have any lingering doubts about the second film in The Twilight Saga, we're here to help. Below is a handy clip 'n' save chart matching your own personality with a customized review of the most hyped film of the year.
Find the category that best matches you, and the truth about New Moon will follow:
Review: 2012 is Total Disaster Porn Overload!
Review in a Hurry: Beyond ridiculous and overstuffed with dizzying computer effects, director Roland Emmerich's 2012 is a disaster pic that pulls no destructive punches. But at more than 2.5 hours, it's close to one earthquake too many.
Review: Pirate Radio a Joyous Li'l Flick About Old Dudes Saving Rock 'n' Roll
Review in a Hurry: Rock 'n' roll and the high seas make an unlikely but jolly combination in this exuberantly directed film by Love, Actually writer/director Richard Curtis. Wisely, Curtis avoids any deep, thoughtful messages or significant thematic matter—that approach would just sink this ship.
Review: Fantastic Mr. Fox Just Simply Fantastic
Review in a Hurry: Awkward-humor auteur Wes Anderson, Oscar-winner George Clooney, and Willy Wonka creator Roald Dahl come together for a stop-motion animated feature that doesn't seem like it should make any sense at all—but it totally does. Fantastic, indeed.