The clock is ticking for monster bride Melissa, who must add five pounds to her svelte 275 in two days to fit into her "body sucker" wedding dress. (We won't even explore that one.)

In terms of pre-alter girth-boosting, the challenges are formidable. Loved ones are stressing her out, impeding the fat baggage addition, and, on a more personal level, there's those five pound dumps she takes.